My brain makes the oddest connections. Witness these two stories.

Number 1. The idea of this article, that high school graduates are getting a graduation present of plastic surgery is something I've heard of before, but I just reflexively winced and moved on. Today, instead of the reflexive wince, I suddenly had an image of an native American with a weathered face. After two seconds, my brain bothered to explain (very kind of it) It pulled back the shot, so I could see the background, a outpatient clinic. Then it pulled back in, and I realized the old man, now crying was Iron Eyes Cody, lamenting the dumping of plastic all over our precious natural resources. "Wow," I thought, "Nice deep reference, brain. I'm proud of you."

Number 2. I got through scanning the first paragraph of this article, picking up the words "Cincinnati", "shopping mall", and "bomb" and before I could get the next to the next sentence, I realized wherever I looked, my mind was surreptitiously inserting into every sentence the phrase "with live turkeys."


I meant to note this last week, but I forgot, and since the first game has passed, I feel like I'm jumping on a bandwagon, only to find its shocks are bad. As you may know, Euro 2004 is going on, and without a dog to hunt in this tournament, I was kind of looking for a team to follow. (Paraguay is of course out, and Belgium is on the sidelines) So I was despairing until seeing this. I especially like the fact that the 12th one is clearly off the pitch, a nice detail. (Look, I'm sorry, but the little guys keep cracking me up.)