Voice controlled blender, okay... Which wins in this case:

The fraughtness: Be careful cleaning this thing. If it goes off, you'll be screaming, and the feedback loop will handle the rest.

The weirdness: "The machine allows the person to access sensorial energies otherwise dormant." "The person speaks the language of the blender."

It's like a Ron Popeil infomercial, directed by David Cronenburg.